Catalyze
by achieving elysium
Summary: AU. "When Shouto was young he thought his father was the strongest hero in the world... Now, years later when Shouto sees the same sight he just sees someone desperate and hungry. There is no tightness around his ribs, no skin clinging to bone, but the hunger is inside of him. Tearing at him. At his heart." When Endeavor becomes a villain, Shouto is left to deal with the aftermath.


**Catalyze**  
achieving elysium

* * *

Villains aren't born from nothing.

Defeating villainy, facing it—Shouto knows that it's not just the end of the road but the beginning of it. Like tracing the roots of a tree to search for its heart.

The facts are this: Todoroki Enji made a sudden turn down the path of villainy. The world has lost a hero. Shouto has lost a father.

The stories speculate. The people are left shaken. What no one else realizes is the line between hero and villain is razor-thin, and somewhere along it lies the fork in the road.

And Todoroki Shouto is the beginning.

* * *

**i. the fall**

_BREAKING NEWS: Endeavor, Villain? _

_Just yesterday, a large fire broke out at the Jet Hero Agency. Concerned, heroes and first responders rushed to the scene, only to be confronted with the number two hero, Endeavor. _

_But Endeavor wasn't there to help. Now-former pro hero Endeavor, who continuously and tirelessly served the public for over twenty years, declared he was a hero no longer, and challenged All Might to face him before leaving the surrounding area burning in flames. _

_Close to fifty people were injured in the fire, though there were no casualties. The Hero Commission has already sent out an emergency alert and stripped Endeavor of his pro hero status, confirming and declaring Endeavor a villain. The news comes as a shock to all of Japan, and has even broken international news. _

_What comes next, no one is sure. Local heroes are working hard to rally support as the number three hero, Best Jeanist, steps up in Endeavor's place. There has been no sign of Endeavor since the incident, and his motivations remain unclear, though many theorize Endeavor's desire to surpass number one hero All Might may have been the cause. For now, Japan waits for what Endeavor will do and if he continues on his rampage, but it is up to the pro heroes and law enforcement to apprehend him. _

_Both All Might and the Todoroki family have declined to comment on Endeavor's sudden turn. _

The day before the fire, Endeavor talks to Shouto. It's an innocuous enough conversation, one that isn't very far from the usual. Shouto doesn't find anything strange; later, he wonders if he should have.

"Shouto."

Shouto keeps his face neutral. He clasps his hands behind his back, trying to stop them from shaking as Endeavor paces back and forth in front of him.

"You wanted to see me," he says, then flatly adds, "Father."

_Father _is a word that has never tasted quite right in his mouth, like thick oil coating his tongue. Shouto feels like he's lying every time he says it. He stares at a spot on the floor and watches Endeavor's feet pass every few seconds.

He's angry. Shouto can tell. It's obvious by the way he's about to walk a hole in the floor—Fuyumi, he knows, will be upset—but Shouto hears the roiling anger in his voice. Out of the corner of his eye Shouto sees the barest flicker of flames.

He's definitely angry.

"What are you doing?" Endeavor roars. Fire pulses in front of him, and Shouto forces himself to still even though he just barely flinches. Ice creeps up the back of his hand, but he wills it away.

"I don't know what you mean."

Just a little longer. Endeavor won't hurt him, so all Shouto has to do is look forward, nod in agreement, and flee as soon as he's able. He'd gotten home earlier than usual from U.A. to find Endeavor waiting for him and his siblings nowhere to be seen. Only the two of them. Dangerous.

Endeavor stops right in front of him. A rough hand grabs Shouto's chin and forces it upward so they look each other in the eye.

"I said," Endeavor growls, "_what _are you doing, Shouto?"

Shouto juts his jaw out defiantly but says nothing otherwise. He doesn't know what Endeavor means, or what he wants. He's determined not to give anything away.

Fire flickers around his face. Shouto can feel the heat of it.

"You're not strong enough!" Endeavor snaps. Shouto flinches this time. "You're not strong enough. You're not good enough, Shouto, and I want to know why."

"I'm learning," Shouto says, trying to placate him. "You know I'm powerful. I just—"

But he stumbles, misses a beat, and Endeavor snatches it from him like a bird does prey.

"Just what?" Endeavor lets him go, and Shouto stumbles backward. "You didn't win the Sports Festival, Shouto. And when I asked, you aren't even the top of your class. If you were really my son, you wouldn't be like this."

_If you were really my son, you wouldn't be like this. _

Shouto doesn't cry. He's never really cried, only a few times, because he learned Endeavor didn't like it. He's not like Izuku, who cries freely, his heart always on his sleeve. Shouto keeps his locked up inside.

The first time he cried, that was what Endeavor said. Face wet, hands bruised, his fire uncontrollable. Shouto cried as his flames died out; he hadn't been able to do what his father wanted.

_If you were really my son, you wouldn't be like this. _

"If you were really _my _son—" Endeavor cuts himself off and turns away. He slams heavy hands on the table, the impact resonating, and bellows wordlessly to the other wall.

"Father…"

"Don't speak to me," Endeavor spits. His shoulders heave. When Shouto was young he thought his father was the strongest hero in the world, looking up at the broad plane of his shoulders, at the way fire curls around him. Now, years later when Shouto sees the same sight he just sees someone desperate and hungry. There is no tightness around his ribs, no skin clinging to bone, but the hunger is inside of him. Tearing at him. At his heart.

"May I be excused?" Shouto murmurs. He doesn't dare leave without permission, but he's already a half-step closer to the door. He presses his left foot back, then his right again, watching carefully.

Endeavor turns. Meets his eyes.

This is the last thing Endeavor will say to him before the fire. This is the last piece of his father that Shouto ever gets, and it is not pretty, and it hurts though Shouto thinks he's heard it a hundred times before.

This is the last thing Endeavor will say to him before the fire. But after the conversation, Shouto flees to the bathroom, locks the door as best as he can, and cries though he doesn't know why yet.

This is the last thing Endeavor will say to him before the fire.

"You disappoint me, Shouto."

**ii. good grief **

_One (1) new message: _

_To listen, press 1. _

_One. _

"_Hello? Shouto, it's me. I know you must be very busy right now, but I really wanted to call you after… after. The police have already spoken to me—I'm not in any trouble because I know you'll worry, but they've determined Endeavor was acting outside of any influence from his family. For now I'm being moved to a secure location. They won't let me tell you where it is yet, but they said I could call you before I go. Hopefully you and your siblings will be able to join me here. _

"_I wish I could see your face right now, Shouto. I'm sorry. I didn't… I didn't know this was going to happen. I didn't realize your father— it must be so hard. I know you looked up to him. _

"_I just wanted to tell you something. I love you, Shouto. And I know you… it's not your fault, and it was never your fault. Please call me back soon. I'll let you know if you can visit sometime." _

_End message. To hear this message again, press 1. To delete this message, press 2. _

_Two. _

Shouto hefts his bag higher on his shoulder. The safe house is exactly as his mother described, cool and plain, nothing remarkable. He supposes that's the point of it—to hide in plain sight, though Shouto knows it's more secure than it looks.

He's escorted in discreetly by security. Once he's inside, the guard remains by the door on vigil. Shouto slips off his shoes and finds a set of soft slippers to put on, then pads through the empty house.

The first thing he notices is that it's small. Home—if it can be called that—is much larger, a flaunt of Endeavor's wealth, and well-decorated if not very comfortable. Here Shouto sees simplicity. A vase of flowers on the dining room table. A painting hanging on the whitewashed walls. He explores carefully, running his finger over furniture.

"Shouto!"

He turns. It's not Mother, though he almost thinks it is—it's Fuyumi instead, wide smile on her face. She's got a book clutched in her hand, and her glasses are slightly askew.

Shouto relaxes. He hasn't seen his sister in a while, and he lets her gently wrap him in a quick hug before tugging him to a different room. Spacious and bright, a row of plants line the far wall beneath a set of tinted windows. Mother's seated on a couch, eyes distant, but when they walk in, she turns and smiles brightly.

"Shouto," she says. Shouto bows in greeting.

"Mother," he responds.

They look at each other for a moment before Mother stands, hurrying towards the kitchen. She returns bearing a tea set, and Shouto takes the tray from her to put on the small side table by the couch.

"Fuyumi, tea?"

"Huh?" Fuyumi says, then pauses on a page. "Oh. Yes, please."

He pours them each a cup, passing one to Mother first, then asks where Natsuo is and if he's coming. Running late, he's told.

"As usual," Fuyumi says, and she and Mother laugh at a joke that Shouto does not understand. He crosses to the lone armchair across from the two of them and perches in it.

"I got your call," he says quietly, folding his hands over each other so they don't see him trembling. "The message you left me. Thank you."

"Oh, _Shouto_." Mother comes and kneels down in front of both of them. There is an easy grace that has always come naturally to her, but there's tension, too. "I'm sorry."

"Mom…" Fuyumi says, taking Mother's hand.

Shouto doesn't move. He feels stiff and wooden and unwelcome. He doesn't know how he's supposed to act here. And he doesn't know how to be— this, them, _family. _The feeling is foreign.

"Did you speak with Detective Makato, too?" Fuyumi asks, when no one says anything. Shouto shakes his head.

"Tsukauchi," he tells them. All Might's friend. He'd felt terrible the entire time, and he knows Detective Tsukauchi is a human lie-detector—not that Shouto had anything to say to him but the truth. _I don't know why he did that. He didn't say anything. I don't know. _

Detective Tsukauchi paused. Like something wasn't quite reading right. Shouto thinks it's because he wasn't telling the entire truth—_I don't know why he did that_ is not necessarily a lie, but Shouto knows Endeavor thought of his son when he started the fire.

They talk for a few minutes about the police investigation into Endeavor. Ugly but necessary. The public outcry. Shouto tells them how he was crowded by swaths of reporters and even a few upset civilians when he'd gone to school yesterday, though thankfully Aizawa-sensei had intervened.

"He's kind," Shouto says, "though he might not always seem like it."

Before they walked into class, Aizawa-sensei stopped him and said, _it doesn't matter what your father does or doesn't do. To me, you are my student, and you will be a hero. _

And then, _he doesn't deserve you. _

Shouto doesn't say any of that. He doesn't quite believe the words yet, so he keeps them instead.

"I'm glad you have someone to support you when I'm not there," Mother murmurs. "I wish I could have seen this coming…"

"It's not your fault," Shouto says. And he believes that, even if it comes out like he doesn't.

"And it's not either of yours," Mother says, looking between them. She takes his hand and squeezes it tightly, her touch warm but her skin cold. "I know it's difficult right now. But we need to keep going."

"We have each other. I think that's enough." Fuyumi's eyes are dark. She smiles wobbly at them and slides off the couch to wrap Mother into a hug. Mother puts one arm around his sister and beckons to him, so he kneels down to and feels her put the other arm around him. Safe. Soft. So different from what he's used to, but welcome.

He puts his head down on Mother's shoulder, and she lifts her hand to stroke his hair.

"Shouto, you are so strong," she whispers in his ear. "I'm so proud of you."

**iii. see it all burn**

_The clip plays. The reporters clamber over each other, shouting out questions as All Might steps out in costume, a smile painted grim on his face. He lets them shout, then holds up a hand. _

"_First I'd like to apologize and welcome you to this last-minute press conference." _

_There aren't any notecards in All Might's hands. No cues. Two minutes prior he stopped a train crash on the rails. _

"_As everyone may be aware, three days ago, the former number two hero and my colleague, Endeavor started a large fire that spread and destroyed many buildings, though there were no deaths thanks to the quick response of local heroes and policemen. He is now classified as a dangerous villain, so it is important for anyone with information to come forward. But that is not the point of my presence here today." _

_All Might appears, as he always does, calm and composed. The ever-present smile is reassuring. A good way to face the public. _

"_After the incident, Endeavor seemed to address and challenge me personally as the number one hero. Having worked with him before, I was aware of a natural competition as high-ranking heroes, but it is difficult for all of us to realize that perhaps that ambition that even I admired ran much deeper than previously thought. Enough for Endeavor to want to defeat me not as a hero, but as a villain._

"_I want to apologize to everyone as the cause of the problem and thank you for your support as we search for Endeavor's whereabouts and attempt to address this tumultuous times. We must rely and believe in each other even now. As for the threat that Endeavor poses and the challenge he has issued, I will do my best to protect and shield others from him, and face him as is my duty. To close, I wish to extend my sincere sympathy for the Todoroki family, thank them for their cooperation, and hope for their health and happiness following these events."_

_All Might steps down from the podium. Lights flash. He smiles blindingly at the cameras, but then waves in departure as people flock to ask him questions. All Might simply shoulders his way through the crowd._

"_I am not accepting any questions following this brief. Thank you for attending."_

_Then he's gone. _

Everything changed the moment Endeavor lit the first flame. Shouto understands that now, stepping through the halls of U.A. People stare and whisper behind his back. Shouto hears every rumor and word.

"Shouto!" Izuku's right by Class 1-A, Uraraka next to him. They wave, and Shouto lifts a hand hesitantly as Izuku breaks through the crowd.

"Izuku," he greets, "Uraraka. It's good to see you."

"You, too," Uraraka says cheerily, a genuine smile on her face. She's always been kind. "We're so glad you're back. Everyone was worried about you."

"Yeah, everyone's going to be happy to see you. Even Kacchan."

"Maybe not," Uraraka concedes, and Shouto smiles despite himself.

"It was just a day or two I couldn't attend," he says, "they just wanted to make sure it was safe, that's all. There shouldn't be any issue going forwards."

"Oh, well that's good," Uraraka says as they walk into class. "Oh! Right! Deku, you got all the notes, right?"

Izuku fumbles in his backpack, but finds a folder and holds it out.

"Ah—thank you."

And the day continues just like any other. None of his other classmates make any fuss or commotion, which Shouto appreciates. A few of them quietly give him their support, which is nice. But it's still a little overwhelming to be back, so Shouto asks to go see Recovery Girl after lunch and departs to somewhere quiet.

It's bright outside. Shouto sits on a bench, only a little guilty about skipping class; he's never done it before, so this is his first. Even that, he supposes, is Endeavor's fault.

He's not alone for long, though. A large figure makes its way through the grounds and stops in front of him. Shouto looks up into All Might's smiling face.

"Young Todoroki," All Might says, "may I?"

Shouto nods.

"You don't have to spend time with this old man if you don't like," All Might continues, "I'm afraid things might be a bit strained between us. I saw you and thought we might have a talk."

"Right. What about? Endeavor?"

"Yes and no. About you, young Todoroki." All Might puts a hand on his shoulder and squeezes. "You're a bright young man with a promising future ahead of you, and I don't want any bad blood between your father and I to reflect in what I think you can become."

"I wanted to be a hero," Shouto says, "but he pushed me a lot, too. He always wanted to—make me strong. Strong enough so that I could… defeat you. I'm sorry. That's not what I want. I want to help people."

"I know." All Might kneels down in front of him and extends a hand. When Shouto doesn't pull away, All Might wraps his arms around him in a gentle hug.

Endeavor would have never done this, he thinks. Endeavor is not gentle or kind; he has never been, and he never will. Shouto blinks with his face pressed to All Might's shoulder and finds himself comforted.

"It's not your fault," All Might tells him, pulling back. He puts his hands on Shouto's shoulder and looks him right in the eye. "It's not your fault."

He can't look away, and the words slip out even though he doesn't mean them to. "It is."

Faint alarm rings All Might's eyes. "What your father chose…"

"I wasn't good enough," Shouto says, and blinks back tears. "If I'd been good enough he would have never been a villain. But he just wants to win."

"He's not good enough for _you,_" All Might says, squeezing his shoulder again. "You'll see, one day."

"Can I go with you?" Shouto blurts. He bites back the words as All Might blinks in surprise. He shouldn't have said that, but it's too late to take them back. He elaborates. "I want to fight."

"Endeavor?"

"He challenged you," and the words are spilling out now, all the things Shouto wanted to say but never got to. "But he's my father, and what he's doing is wrong, and I want to help stop him."

"It's dangerous—"

"I know."

All Might sighs. "I'm sorry, young Todoroki. You know—as a hero, as a teacher… as someone who cares about you, I cannot let you fight him. I don't want him to hurt you more than he already has."

But hasn't Endeavor spent years sending lances through Shouto's heart? Hasn't Endeavor been the cause of the littered cuts on Shouto's hands as he hit the ground during training, the bruises on his back? Hasn't Endeavor already taken his childhood from him?

"Is there anything I can do?" All Might asks. "For you or your family. I'd like to help you."

"Then stop him for me," Shouto says. He lifts his chin. Ice soothing over burns. "That's the only thing I need."

**iv. fall, again**

_Grainy video footage from above. Smoke drifts in plumes, obscuring the camera's view as the low hum of a helicopter pulses in the background. Through the darkness, pockets of light appear—bursts of orange and red flame._

_The smoke clears, and the camera zooms on two figures fighting. Brawling through the city, All Might sends Endeavor back with a reeling punch. Smoke billows around him, and fire races back. A dangerous fight. _

_They crash through a building. Then another. _

_Locked in a stronghold, Endeavor pushes forward. His fire burns brighter and brighter until it's nothing but a smear of glowing white on the camera, and then he forces All Might back. _

_One step. Then two. A third, as the ground cracks under All Might's feet. _

_The camera shakes, then goes black. _

Shouto is running through the city, armed with ice. Jagged spikes of it form on his arm, spiralling up his side as he pushes through the smoke. His eyes sting, but he covers his mouth and pushes through.

The wreckage is nearly unbelievable. It's a miracle the heroes managed to evacuate everyone as Endeavor appeared, followed only mere minutes by All Might. Shouto saw the news, then the live footage shared online. When he saw All Might stumble, he ran.

There's the sound of exploding concrete in the distance, so Shouto pushes further into the battlefield and runs toward the sound. In the distance he sees All Might, and a bright epicenter that can only be Endeavor.

Endeavor strikes right at All Might's heart. All Might blocks, but Endeavor grabs his arm as fire burns. There's a choked cry before All Might retaliates, and Shouto's heart leaps in his throat as he races toward them.

Just days ago, Shouto was the beginning of the fall. He readies himself, steps over cracks in the street and strides forward with his head held high. Now he is the end of it.

"Why?" All Might shouts over the blood roaring in Shouto's ears. "Stop this, Endeavor!"

Endeavor appears, rising from the ashes. There's blood on his face as he grits his teeth. He yells wordlessly, and even from far away Shouto can feel the heat.

"I'll take you down, All Might," Endeavor snarls, wiping blood from his mouth. He lunges forward, All Might bracing for impact—

Ice.

Cold and crystalline, it sinks across concrete, rooting itself in the ground and crackling as it swallows Endeavor. It's melted in an instant, but a burning gaze turns in Shouto's direction.

Shouto clenches his fists. Ice forms again as the heat presses in threateningly.

"Todoroki—" All Might gasps. He flicks his hand. Another sheet of ice that Endeavor breaks through, and Shouto narrows his eyes.

"Hello, Father," he says, and comes to stand next to All Might. They face each other. For the first time, Shouto looks Endeavor in the eye.

"_Shouto…_"

"Don't call me that," Shouto says, and he thinks of all the people who said, _it's not your fault. You are better than him. He is not good enough for you. _"You don't deserve to."

Ice flicks out, gleaming and sharp. Shouto straightens his shoulders and stands on the opposite side of his father.

_If you were really my son, you wouldn't be like this. _

"I'm happy to disappoint," Shouto says, tilting his head. "Would you like to see what I'm really capable of?"


End file.
